Thursday, August 31, 2006

Air Canada - Brokeback Airlines?

The crew of an Air Canada passenger jet was forced to break down the cockpit door in mid-air after the pilot locked himself out when he popped out for a minute to use the toilet at the back of the Air Canada Jazz aeroplane. The bizarre incident occured with 30 minutes to go of an internal flight from Ottawa to Winnipeg.
Hmmm. And it seems, aside from being funny, a little troubling. Apparantly this pilot was talking on an internal microphone to the First Officer IN the cockpit during the incident.
Hmmm again. Couldn't the First Officer have simply unlocked the door? Were they angry at each other? Was the First Officer afraid of the pilot? Why wouldn't he open the door? Was the First Officer having too much fun steering?

Pilot - "Let me in, Bruce!"
First - "No, you never let me steer."
Pilot - "Just open the door."
First - "Sure sure, you're always nice when we're alone, but in public, oh no, you ignore me then."
Pilot - "I won't ignore you anymore, just OPEN THE FRIGGIN' DOOR."
First - "If you're going to swear at me like that ...."
Pilot - "Bruce, this is embarrassing, the passengers who aren't terrified are laughing."
First - "So I'm a laughing stock am I?"
Pilot - "Sheeeez .... Anybody got a screwdriver?"
First - "You won't find one, they're not allowed. Terrorists could use them."
Pilot - "Bruce. please open the door."
First - "No, you could be a terrorist."
Pilot - "Just undo the lock, I promise I won't be mad."
First - "I can't reach it, I'm busy steering."
Pilot - "We'll say the lock got stuck. I'll let you land. "
First - "Promise?"

The troubling thing is that Manon Stuart, spokeswoman for Air Canada, when explaining the 'event' said, "We investigated the incident and the crew followed standard operational procedure."
What? They have a procedure for when the pilot locks himself out of the cockpit? Is it in a manual somewhere? Rule 5A? Just under Parachuting?
I'm not sure if it's funny or not?


  1. Anonymous11:30 am

    Sad sad sad.....
    But you made it soooooo funny...

  2. Anonymous8:57 pm

    That was a very funny read I love your sense of humor.....


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